Revenge of the Nerds

May 31, 2010

One line review: Yet another 80’s comedy that is short on logic and long on stupid humor; how many more of these do I have to go through?

Movie Title: Revenge of the Nerds

Actors: Robert Carradine, Anthony Edwards, Timothy Busfield, Andrew Cassese, Curtis Armstrong, Larry B. Scott, Brian Tochi, Julia Montgomery, Michelle Meyrink, Ted McGinley, Matt Salinger, Donald Gibb

Director: Jeff Kanew

Year: 1984

Genre: Comedy

Method of Viewing: DVD

Location of Viewing: Home

Viewing with: Family

Rotten Tomatoes: 76% – Somewhere in all the fluff and garbage is just enough heart to make Revenge of the Nerds one of the forefathers of a generation of light-hearted comedies like American Pie, American Pie 2 and American Wedding.

My rating: **

My assessment (the first 101 words at least): I’m growing seriously tired of these stupid 80’s comedies. They have nothing to support them but their crappy characters and gags. Yes, Ogre is a fun character and basically the only reason this movie is getting all the way up to 2 stars. However, I feel that there’s so little to actually enjoy with this movie. I don’t know if watching all these movies has somehow made me a cinema snob, but I’m simply embarrassed to be caught watching these movies. Perhaps I’m out of the age range, and find it childish now, but this movie just feels worthless to me.


A Christmas Story

May 3, 2010

One line review: The title says it all, it’s just A Christmas Story, one boring story with nothing special at all.

Movie Title: A Christmas Story

Actors: Melinda Dillon, Darren McGavin, Peter Billingsley, Ian Petrella, Scott Schwartz, R.D. Robb, Tedde Moore, Yano Anaya, Zack Ward, Jeff Gillen

Director: Bob Clark

Year: 1983

Genre: Comedy

Method of Viewing: TV (TBS 24 Hour Marathon)

Location of Viewing: Home

Viewing with: Family

Rotten Tomatoes: 88% – Both warmly nostalgic and darkly humorous, A Christmas Story deserves its status as a holiday perennial.

My rating: **

My assessment (the first 101 words at least): Yet another movie where I simply can’t understand the appeal. This movie feels like it’s just a boring tale of some kid’s Christmas. There’s no real antagonist, and a very weak central plot. It’s really just a collection of mini-tales from childhood. Everyone says that it reminds them of their childhood, and while I saw a few small scenes, overall it was just some stories. I didn’t find much humor, I didn’t find much heart warming stuff, and was there even a message that most Christmas movies have? This might capture childhood, but it seems to forget it needs a purpose.

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Superman II: The Richard Donner Cut

February 14, 2010

One line review: A film that once again suffers from over an hour of plot holes and stupidity before finally getting to some decent superhero action.

Movie Title: Superman II: The Richard Donner Cut

Actors: Gene Hackman, Christopher Reeve, Marlon Brando, Ned Beatty, Jackie Cooper, Sarah Douglas, Margot Kidder, Jack O’Halloran, Valerie Perrine, Clifton James, E.G. Marshall, Marc McClure, Terence Stamp

Director: Richard Donner

Year:[Superman II] 1980 / [Superman II: The Richard Donner Cut] 2006

Genre: Action / Adventure

Method of Viewing: DVD

Location of Viewing: Home

Viewing with: No One

Rotten Tomatoes: [Superman II] 87% – The humor occasionally stumbles into slapstick territory, and the special effects are dated, but Superman II meets, if not exceeds, the standard set by its predecessor.

[Superman II: The Richard Donner Cut] 83% – This version of Superman II is a triumph of intention, sending the imagination soaring again over this new angle on a very old question mark.

My rating: **

My assessment (the first 101 words at least): I simply can’t understand why either of the two Superman movies I saw are considered so good. If this is considered good I can only dread what the sequels would hold in store for me. There are enough plot holes in this movie to make my mind melt, there are enough stupid actions by characters to make me wish I could smack each and every one of them up side the head. I’m now convinced that there is no live action movie that truly captures Superman, they seem too busy trying to make Superman a comedy rather than an action movie.

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Superman

February 1, 2010

One line review: A superhero movie that seems to be short on action, and big on Superman’s boring origin.

Movie Title: Superman

Actors: Marlon Brando, Gene Hackman, Christopher Reeve, Ned Beatty, Jackie Cooper, Glenn Ford, Trevor Howard, Margot Kidder, Jack O’Halloran, Valerie Perrine, Maria Schell, Terence Stamp, Phyllis Thaxter, Susannah York, Jeff East

Director: Richard Donner

Year: 1978

Genre: Action / Adventure

Method of Viewing: DVD

Location of Viewing: Home

Viewing with: No One

Rotten Tomatoes: 93% – Superman deftly blends humor and gravitas, taking advantage of the perfectly cast Christopher Reeve to craft a loving, nostalgic tribute to an American pop culture icon.

My rating: **

My assessment (the first 101 words at least): It first has to be said that I didn’t watch the original film, I saw the director’s cut. Perhaps that why I felt this movie spent far too much time on Jor-El, or young Kal El, rather than just telling a Superman story. In the end, Superman’s story is not interesting, and somehow this movie made it even less interesting. Only after Superman starts acting like Superman did I start to enjoy this movie, and even then it was over too soon. It’s also difficult to forgive this movie’s numerous plot holes and silly special effects. This movie hasn’t aged well.

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Top Gun

January 17, 2010

One line review: Take your standard action movie, remove 60% of the action and replace it with bromance.

Movie Title: Top Gun

Actors: Tom Cruise, Kelly McGillis, Val Kilmer, Anthony Edwards, Tom Skerritt, Michael Ironside, John Stockwell, Barry Tubb, Rick Rossovich, Tim Robbins, Clarence Gilyard Jr., Whip Hubley

Director: Tony Scott

Year: 1986

Genre: Action / Drama

Method of Viewing: DVD

Location of Viewing: Home

Viewing with: No One

Rotten Tomatoes: 46% – Once Top Gun gets back to earth, the master of the skies is as clunky as a big land-bound bird.

My rating: **

My assessment (the first 101 words at least): It’s difficult for me to figure out if this movie was ruined for me simply by the boring plot, or by Tom Cruise current crazy antics distracting me whenever he was on screen. Either way, this movie seems like it was made to be on Rifftrax only, and never actually taken seriously. Even if you can muscle your way through an hour of mostly boring scenes of the drama of fighter pilot school, the action itself is too chaotic to actually follow. This movie simply feels empty, as though it’s struggling to fill time with half-naked guys and playing Danger Zone.

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The Blues Brothers

January 2, 2010

One line review: Perhaps if I was more of a fan of the music, I’d be a fan of this movie.

Movie Title: The Blues Brothers

Actors: John Belushi, Dan Aykroyd, James Brown, Cab Calloway, Ray Charles, Carrie Fisher

Director: John Landis

Year: 1980

Genre: Musical / Comedy

Method of Viewing: DVD

Location of Viewing: Home

Viewing with: No One

Rotten Tomatoes: 84% – Too over the top for its own good, but ultimately rescued by the cast’s charm, director John Landis’ grace, and several soul-stirring musical numbers.

My rating: **

My assessment (the first 101 words at least): Once again I feel that nostalgia has blinded people to how good this movie is. Back in my Caddyshack review I complained that every person had seemed to forget that about half of Caddyshack focused on teenagers and their problems. However, with the other half being a fantastic comedy, it all balanced out well. This movie on the other hand is 90% musical, 10% action / comedy. That action / comedy may be pretty dang good, but it by no means makes up for everything else you have to sit through. Unless you love the music, this movie is just boring.

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Tron

December 25, 2009

One line review: What once was a technological marvel has little to offer to the modern viewer.

Movie Title: Tron

Actors: Jeff Bridges, Bruce Boxleitner, David Warner, Cindy Morgan, Barnard Hughes, Dan Shor, Peter Jurasik, Tony Stephano

Director: Steven Lisberger

Year: 1982

Genre: Action / Adventure

Method of Viewing: DVD

Location of Viewing: Home

Viewing with: No One

Rotten Tomatoes: 68% – Although Tron’s state-of-the-art, computer-generated visuals look primitive by current standards, it’s intelligently conceived (on a visual level, at any rate) and largely good fun.

My rating: **

My assessment (the first 101 words at least): This is definitely a movie that has not stood the test of time. It feels as though it’s completely reliant on visuals to entertain the viewers when the plot isn’t moving forward. Even when you simply focus on the plot, it’s a very simplistic one that doesn’t seem to live up to the hype that has surrounded it. To top that off, being a programmer does not help me appreciate the world that surrounds this film. While I was able to understand the cult following the Star Wars film had, I simply can’t understand why this film was considered a classic.

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